The Healing Power of Long-term Friends and Feeling Our Emotions .............8/2/12

“The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet

our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.”      Don Williams Jr.

Image: "Tullamore Lane" by Tim Blessed.  Copyrighted photograph, all rights reserved. 

Gratitudes for Thursday:
1. Today, it happened.  I got clarity on issues that were troubling me. And the clarity I got was not what I hoped for. I found out that resolving
one of these concerns involves a three part project, due next Tuesday by 11:00 a.m.

      I have work cut out for me.  But, seeing the truth helps.  Problems do not go away, if ignored.  Sanity involves seeing circumstances as they are. I have no interest in living by defensive hope.  For more on this subject, and the elimination of it that contributes towards saner relationships, please read here.

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength." 

        I'm glad I am breaking down this project into manageable pieces. I'm glad for having the presence of mind to know what I need to do, even when in crisis. I'm even happier knowing a peace that transcends my circumstances.  It is the result of maintaining a close relationship with my Higher Power.

"Be still and know I am God." 
                                               Psalms 46:10.

       The word "be still" in this passage is shalom. What many may not know is that it means more than "peace." It also means, "cease from striving, from hustling, trying make things happen in our own human power."

        One thing I've learned from Al-Anon Family Groups is that I'm powerless over my depression, when I feel it.  I'm powerless over the unmanageability of my life. This realization is first step towards recovering whatever tranquility and emotional safety I've lost.

        I need a power greater than myself to get the sanity and serenity I seek.  I'm sorry, I disagree with most of the medical community.  I believe psychotropics----psychological medications---and most people's experience with therapy, hibernate the problem. These two means often prolong people's issues by not addressing the causes of trauma that creates depression, anxiety and any other emotional dysfunction.
2. I addressed two emotionally difficult business issues today. They took their toll on me.  Facing something I dread is never fun.  But it was what I needed to do.

"Courage faces fear and thereby masters it."
" Courage is fear that has said its prayers."
"Worry is God's job."

3. I was shocked today.
      It's been awhile since that has happened.  Fortunately, I considered my options and took steps so I could get the support needed. The best thing is that I have Balcony People.
      Today, when I needed  the life preserver of their wisdom and care they were available.
4. One source of support was speaking with two dear friends, both I've known for more than twenty years.
      Connecting with them made the day bearable.  I'm glad we discussed what was troubled me.  I'm fortunate that I've invested the time in having friends who are more like a brother, than a friend.  Having these type of relationships do not happen overnight, nor without effort.

"Friendship is a plant of slow growth that must endure many seasons of adversity before it is worthy of that appellation."    George Washington

        Cultivating my relationship with my Balcony People requires honesty, authenticity, being available, working through disagreements and the passage of many seasons in our relationship.
        Today, the sweet fruit of this plant nurtured me. The empathy, wisdom and insight my friends offered was like drinking a glass of cool water on a parched day.
5. I allowed myself to experience my emotions. Tears rolled down my face, while talking with one of these two friends today. I wasn't aware until then, how upset I was.
      For the longest time, as a young man, I hid from my inner self.  I was not in touch with my feelings.  In fact, I thought I was mature when I dwelled within my head.  I believed my emotions where the weaker side to me.

       Not true.

       I've discovered that connecting with my feelings and discharging the negativity energy felt when experiencing trauma, quickens my regaining equilibrium.

      Today, I embraced the negative feelings coursing through me.  I was not ashamed of the sensations.  I now see that my bodily reaction to bad news revealed that I am growing, getting better.  Allowing myself to respond this way contributes towards my emotional and physical health. Crying, trembling, shaking---however we respond to stress---is nature's way of letting out all the emotional and psychological toxins within our mortal coil.

       I'm grateful that I allow my body a say in matters vital for me.  It is part of the team that helps me move forward. Being in tune with my felt self----the primal, bodily portion of me, knowing God's gentle, gracious love and enjoying the support of my Balcony People better equips me as I tackle what needs to be done.
     
       Most importantly this teamwork permits me to enjoy serenity even when overwhelmed by circumstances.
How About You? 
1. Where have you been experiencing clarity, regarding your life?
2. What helps you, when facing stress. For me, I let my body feel what it was going through. I spoke with two dear friends, seeking their support.  I was gentle towards myself. I created a plan to address my concerns.  I didn't stay in my head. I did not perseverate.