It's 2:05 in the morning. Why am I alert? I ran eight miles this evening. I am ener-gized by the exertion and in a good mood, too.
I have not posted a list of gratitudes in a long while. Here they are:
1. For the growing patience I have towards myself. I am already patient with me.Recov-ery reveals the value of being even more gentle towards my-self.
am growing in the kind-ness and patience I have towards myself.
The benefits? My heart rate is slower. I'm smiling more. Slowing down my thoughts when they want to race allows me to stay in the moment, to be present. It helps me enjoy greater peace of mind and serenity."Condemning my imperfections has never enhanced my appreciation of life or helped me to love myself more." Courage to Change, p. 19
I witness con-stant reminders, every week, from clients who suffer because their desire to get better is weak-er than my desire to help them. The re-sults? Their life becomes difficult, they endure chaos. I will not do for others what they need to do for themselves.
This is not being unkind. It means I am not codependent. I do not cosign for the liabilities of others. It also means I keep my sanity by adhering to boundaries.
live by inade-quate, immature, lazy, or false beliefs.
3. For pushing my body with exercise.
It's fun. Invigorating. When I run, I recall the joy I had as a young man, when I ran cross country and track. I have run 42 miles (67.59 km) this week.
Today, I ran one-way 3.5 miles in hilly country that surrounds Lake Chabot. That is when I hit a hill that went up for .7 of a mile at a steep
Tonight, I stumbled upon six deer while running.Thank-fully, I bought a headband that has a light. I was like a coal miner as I ran, my path lit before me, attracting plenty of moths. I ate only a few while gasping for breath.
Now, five hours later, I don't feel sore.
friends. I dis-covered their true nature. They cor-rected and gave advice I did not ask for. Their comments where based on in-terpretations of what I said, what they read into what I said. Their conclusions were not accurate. I let them know that I need safety when relating with them. That means being free of their judgments.
It appears they have difficulty being transparent, authentic, when communicating. I may be wrong, but that is what it looks like. If we want depth in relationships, there is a need for being real.
Regarding their response to me, I choose love. I decided to separ-ate from these advice-giving friends for awhile. That's taking care of me.
5. I am thankful for helpful values that guide me. They prevent me from being externally referented. For which I am very grateful.
How About You?
What are your three gratitudes for today?