Great Time With a Friend: Balance Required........... 2/28/23

Part of the view as we traveled
along the Marshall Petaluma Road

    I'm back after a two-month ab-sence from this inn of gratitude.  I am not who I was the last time I left something here. Although my soul then was happy and remains that way.    

     I continue to relish positivity, hope, and joy--- in all ways---emotionally, spiritually, and mentally.

     Life is different this year from last. I am evolving. I am removing emotional clutter.

    This includes some-one I've known for more than 9 years. On the other hand, I embrace healthy, dynamic relation-ships. I do not accept unacceptable behav-ior or relationships.

    My connections with others must be satisfying, and active.  Life is too short to tolerate passive friendships, where I carry the load for it to exist. 

     I will never be, nor desire to be Justin Timberlake. I avoid pressure from passive people to metaphorically dance, sing, act, and come up with ideas about how we will spend time together.  With good friends, I am simply my unvarnished self. 

    That is enough. No performance necessary. 

     Dynamic friend-ships require reci-procity, mutuality, balance, and fair-ness. 

     This is essential for the time shared to sing with joy, and zest for life. In gen-uine  friendships, moments shared are rich and effort-less. Neither person leads or follows.  

     The relationship does not need stimulation.  It is real, and that is enough. 

     Two Saturdays ago I  thrived, enjoying time with a friend during the day, and well into the night.  We went for a joyride. We toured Marin County, its coastal region just north of San Francisco. 

     We rolled along the bay waters from the sparsely popula-ted and quiet town of Marshall to Stinson Beach, located near Mt, Tamalpais. We inhaled the verdant beauty of Northern California's back-roads. We took in its rolling hills.  

     We talked anima-tedly about what motivates our fears and why we over-think, two forms of us being controlling.  The lively dialog transpired while we rolled southward through dales and hills. Our ride included scooting along the coastline of the Tomales and Bolinas bays.

     I know this guy for more than forty years, we share common friends. 

     Dinner at the Park-side Restaurant in Stinson Beach was beyond marvelous.  Both the meal and our conversation were first-class. 

     My gratitude for this lovely evening: 

1. I enjoy and luxuriate in the recovery I have because of my involvement with Al-Anon Family Groups. This is not a nick-name for Alcoholics Anonymous. For more info, check out this link. 

    Because of this fellowship, life is more fully orbed, less insecure.  I discovered my wants and needs and how to express them because of this program.  There is a group near you, if interested. 

2. The delight in the warm silence experienced between two good friends. No need for constant chatter. It's okay to enjoy each other's company silently.  

3. I am increasingly saying what I want and what I feel when with oth-ers. I am less frustrated, less angry, and much happier.  Tactfulness is essential, however.  I don't want to be so assertive I'm an ass.  

Tactfulness is knowing how to make a point without making an enemy.