I'm Not Who I Used to Be ............... 5/10/12

If a fellow isn't thankful for what he's got, he isn't likely to
 be thankful for what he's going to get.   ~Frank A. Clark 
Image: "Wetlands: Golden Pond" by Tim Blessed. All rights reserved.
Copyrighted material. Used by permission. 

     I was stunned, earlier today.  I'm not the person I thought I was.  As a young man, I was an
ENTJ, the Field Marshall. That was true about me, back then, when I worked in management for a major corporation.  Then I became an INTJ---the Mastermind---after I married, raised a family, grew in my profession and worked on my personal vulnerabilities.  (Please see footnote.)

      These assessments are according to the Myers Briggs Personality Inventory Test.  Over 30 million people have taken it. For the first time in 10 years, I took the test today.

       I discovered I'm now an INFJ.  Which is shocking to me.  I know all about NFs, Idealists. I'm glad I done recovery work before I became an NF, because, usually, they---we---are pretty sensitive.

       For Idealists, feelings, theirs, and that of others, are most important, more than thinking.  My personality type is known as the Counselor. So, it doesn't surprise me that that is what I am now.

       I'm more cooperative than I used to be.  So, according to the Meyers-Briggs test I'm an Idealist (NF), no longer a Rational (NT).  Does that make me irrational??

       I have changed. My personal growth has made me more compassionate, gentler towards myself and others and less dogmatic. I'm grateful for these improvements. So are the people who know me. :)

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      Today, for twenty miles I rode my bike. I discovered new places to explore, all along the shore of the San Francisco Bay.  After five miles, I was tired, but persevered. This evening, I feel the effects of today's ride on my forearms.  I'll sleep well, after posting this.

My Gratitudes for Wednesday:

1. I spent time by myself. In the morning, I studied and had time to reflect. In the afternoon I was on my bike for an hour and forty minutes. I'm thankful for the self-acceptance that allows me to luxuriate in time alone. 

2. I had a terrific conversation with a friend tonight.  I enjoyed the companionship and respect we had for each other. 

3. I hung out with a bunch of friends this evening. I love being a part of a loving community of friends.

Friends are the family that we choose. 

4. I'm setting goals. I like how they motivate me. I'm thankful for the purpose they offer and how goals increases my effectiveness. As I've mentioned before, the ancient Greeks had a saying:

"If we aim at nothing, that's exactly what we get."
.
Challenging My Body 

      I've ridden for a total of 60 miles in the last three days, something I haven't done before.  I've been sharing with the guests to this inn my experiences on my bike. What you don't know is that I hadn't been on one in more than 30 years.

      My cycling workouts are becoming more rigorous.  I enjoy the challenge and thrill of pushing my body. I'm grateful for exercise and the balance I'm adding to my life---it can be very easy to stay within my head, not a good thing to do.
   
      I'm in touch with my body, when working out. A part of me that's easy to neglect due to the demands of work, family and life.  Even better, getting out on the road with my bicycle has me connecting with nature.

     I live in a beautiful part of the world. Sand and surf, plenty of trees, fantastic, non-humid weather, gentle bay breezes, makes my time on two wheels a delight not only for my body, but for my soul and eyes. I won't comment on the many women I pass by, while getting in a ride.  :->

6. I see that my personal recovery from co-dependency has improved my personality. It is easy, if we are not careful, to be addicted to unhealthy relationships and lose our centeredness---if a co-worker is angry, we get triggered. If someone we care about is depressed, we are affected.

      I'm thankful learning that I want to care about, but not for, others. Balance is key for my equanimity and emotional safety. Relationships are more important to me than facts or results.

     However, I balance connecting with others with a mindful adherence to my values. I appreciate the ongoing growth of who I am, that's a consistently evolving part of my life. 

How About You?

1. How are you different from who you were ten years ago?

2. What are some goals you've recently set for yourself?
   As always, I enjoy hearing from you.

Footnote

For more about personality types, as presented by the Myers-Briggs test, please click here. 

If you'd like to take the test, click here. Let me know what you found out about yourself.