Good Friends, An Emotional Oasis In the Desert of Society, Revisited. .............9/30/12

Gratitude is the fairest blossom
which springs from the soul.
Henry Ward Beecher
Image: "Single Rose" by Tim Blessed. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

   Good evening,

I wrote the following last year in May. I'm bumping it up.  I'd love hearing your responses to the questions at the end of this post.

**************

 Welcome to the inn.  Thanks for dropping by.  May I offer

Connecting with Guests of This Inn---Looking Forward to Hearing From You ..................................9/29/12

      Good evening everyone,

Here I am, again, closing out the day.  How was yours?  Mine was terrific,

Dealing With Disappointment ---500th Post .........9/28/12

A stiff apology is a second insult…. The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt.~G.K. Chesterton

          Recently, someone sent me a disappointing letter.  In it she tried apologizing for ruining my birthday

A Busy, Inspiring Week, Detaching With Love From An Unsatisfying Relationship. Also, the Importance of Bonding With Loving Friends .....................................................9/27/12

“Only the development of compassion and understanding
 for others can bring us the tranquility and happiness we all seek.” 
― Dalai Lama XIV

A Busy But Good Week
       I'm tired.  I've awaken from a well-deserved nap, my eyes sore, weary from opening at 4:00 or 5:30 a.m., every day this week, after retiring after midnight, every night.  Man, this week could end today and I'd

A Happy But Tired Innkeeper .................................9/26/12

      Good evening everyone,

I had the most amazing day.  Let me get to the good part, first. I had a fantastic date with a kind, intelligent, woman who has a fantastic smile.  And she was

Speaking The Truth Gently, Overcoming The Weak Areas of My Personality .................................9/26/12

    How are you,

I've been busy.  You've gathered that, I bet. My posts have been brief.  Rising early---at 5:00 a.m, most mornings, attending workshops and aggressively

A Grateful Innkeeper ................................9/24/12

   Good evening everyone,

I just got home. How was your day?
My Gratitudes for Today:
1. I attended a workshop and am learning about resources available that will help me with my business.
2. I had an amazing experience on the corner of

A Grateful Innkeeper

Gratitudes for Sunday:
1. Today, I met with friends.  I'm thankful for

A Spiritual Awakening, Appreciating Life's Gifts, Revisited ........9/23/12

Forgiveness is man's deepest need and highest achievement. Horace Bushnell
To forgive is God-like, and one of the greatest uses of our free will.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Mahatma Ghandi
Forgiveness is the price of Happiness. Mark Pilbeam, Hellsgeriatric
Forgiveness is freedom. Tony Dailo,
The glory of Christianity is to conquer by forgiveness. William Blake
Unforgiveness is the burning of the bridge we must cross ourselves.
(The photographer's caption)

      Good morning.  Yep, I usually don't work this early at the inn.  I wish everyone a wonderful Sunday.

        I'm bumping this post up.  It was written the first month this inn opened it's doors.  One of the all-time most popular posts, it is.  I hope, as suggested below, you'll discover a moment today where you experience one of the small gifts God gives us, each day, if

Taking Stock of This Week: Want to Join Me? 9/22/12

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive 

the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move 
forward.”   Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free 

Image: "Wetlands: Autumn Sunshine by Tim Blessed. Copyrighted photograph. 

How About You?  What allows you to move on, beyond your past? Besides what I wrote in yesterday's post,

Acceptance, With Empowering Options, & Grace, Not Condemnation or Resignation .............................9/21/12

“Letting go doesn't mean that you don't care about someone anymore. It's just
 realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” 
― Deborah Reber, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul

      The following is a comment I wrote at Morgan's blog, who has been dropping by here recently.  It was a response to a post of hers about letting go of the past. I thought I'd share my

Complaining Only Makes Our Problems Larger and More Disturbing ..........9/20/12

     Hi there, everyone,

How was your Wednesday? I running a bit behind. Usually I get my entries before the midnight witching hour.  Not so, today.

      Tuesday, I handled the

Growth: Removing What Makes Us Comfortable With Unacceptable Circumstances ................................9/18/12

My default mode, in relationships, if I'm not careful.  

     Good morning all,

Have you missed me? I'm tired. My head is pinching me, from

Boundaries: A Source for Sanity ....................9/14/12

     Good evening,

How are you?  So many good things happened this week, a time rife with tension and deep, negative emotions.
My Gratitudes for Friday:
1. I received tremendous support this week, beyond my wildest dreams.
2. I was loved in many different ways this week.  I'm still stunned by the

        Good morning everyone,

How are you?  I'm glad to return to the Attitude of Gratitude Inn.  This day was challenging, fun, demanding, exciting and fulfilling.

       I'm changing my work routine.  It's been years since

Happiness is a Choice; Gratitude is a Choice (Better to stay in the solution than dwelling on the problem.) Revisited...............9/11/12

       Good evening.  I had an intense morning, but fun. I trained another, showing her how

Perseverance: Essential for Success, Revisited 9/9/12

In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream

 always wins–not through strength but by perseverance.”

 – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

       Service helps those who perform it.

       Such was the case, as I re-wove ideas taken from Beth Allen.  When finished, I was encouraged, invig-orated.   My hope is her comments will inspire you, too.

        Being consis-tently diligent in applying---daily---healthy principles, is necessary if we want personal progress, recovery.

       We do not become the person we want to be, by remain-ing the way we are.  Healthy values are to be a reality, not nice ideas floating in our mind.  Living the same old way, everyday, is a form of Learned Helplessness.

       If there is no movement towards wholeness, progress is nonex-istent.  Learned Helplessness is a form of denial.  We are not addressing what we can to do to have the life we want and deserve.
   

      We want to work on our weaknesses until they become our strengths.

       Recovery is to be anchored within our soul.  It is to be the core of who we are.  It is demonstrated in our lives. We want to be ideologically consistent.

       This means having integrity, being true to our values.

       Characterological change is not feeding our minds.  Principles of knowledge are not silver bullets.  Information does not slay the beasts we face in life.

       Knowledge will not overcome life's monsters of depression and fear. Thoughts alone do not overcome anxiety, or external referenting.  Personal growth, equanimity, and the strength that comes with it require strenuous, continual effort.

       Just like the guy pictured above.

       Such effort is birthed by realizingwe want to get the most out of life, not just live with resignation.  Our life improves when we replace the areas where we need to grow----with a new and better be-havior. (One Day At A Time, p. 280.)

        Growth isn't talking a good game.  We know words are cheap.  Spiritual regeneration that is real----or the lack of it----is reflected in every breath we take.

        Our character is revealed in the way we hold our shoulders, stomach, how we walk and smile.  It is reflected in how we treat the less fortunate when others are not looking,  We demonstrate who we are when we respond to those who lie to us, or try to manipulate.

        Being pleasant to unpleasant people while remaining true to our boundaries reveals recovery from codepend-ency. 

       The following re-written post reminds us to persevere.  We can, if  we rely on God's strength.  It also helps being mindful of the love many have for us.

       We are lovable, even when the world swirls us around and we do not know which end is up.  Holding fast to affirming principles, plac-ing them above our personality, gives us serenity and joy. 

        Listen to this from Beth Allen:

If someone asked me for one character quality that is the cor-nerstone for success, I would say perseverance.  Being great athletes, parents, leaders or achieving anything else---weight loss, reducing clutter, getting our finances in order, is really about willingness to per-sist in the face of challenges. We use these opportunities as a means to exercise our commit-ment towards whatever goal we seek.

Expecting the road to success to be a cakewalk leads to disap-pointment. No one is immune to the obstacles life presents. However, I hold the power to choose what I do with whatever challenge I face. 

So, how about you? Do you persist when times are tough?  Do you pause while assessing the obstacle? 

Do you view your situation positively, that what you face is an opportunity that can lead to growth and fulfillment?  

This is where a positive attitude is critical. [Click here, for more about this.] We live in a society of instant gratification. Many of us treat our goals in the same manner. 

  We may expect instant mas-tery, flawless performan-ces. We may want overnight success.  The truth is, our character and potential are determined by how we deal with the obstacles we face.  

It is in these moments that we can take it one step at a time, towards the fruition of our dreams.      Beth Allen

******** 

When nothing seems to help, I look at a stone cutter hammering away at his rock perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it.  

Yet at the hundred and first blow it may split in two. I know it was not that blow that did it, but all that had gone before.      Jacob Riis 

How About You? 

1. What helps you persevere, when you want to give up on a challenge, project, relationship, job or dream?  

2. What do you find as a source of strength, during difficult times? 

3. What quotes or principles spur you on, when times are tough? It would be great if we could share ideas that can inspire one another. 

     I'd love hearing your answers. 

The Strength and Courage Derived From Love: I Need It and Am Experiencing It

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
 while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu

     The dreaded moment has arrived. I have to do something that is perhaps the most difficult thing I will do all year. Got your curiosity?

Balcony People and Taking Care of Ourselves......: 9/7/12

Balcony People Prevent Us From Falling

       Receiving amaz-ing, beyond belief, support is hearten-ing.

      Major but scary areas in our lives can confronted when given this assistance.  We can enjoy little, but significant victories.  It is the little foxes that ruin the vineyards of life.

      These foxes can be captured, returned to their natural habitat.  This reduces the terror they can create.

        Loving letters from friends bolster our re-solve.

        Supportive phone calls lift us up.  Empathy lets us know we are not alone during tough times.  When needed, keeping good company helps us make it through the day.  It is a bridge that gets us over difficult moments.

       This loving support makes it possible to move forward.  No man is an island. Confronting challenges is easier when taking them one day at a time.  Sometimes, when situations are especially rough, it is better overcoming them fifteen minutes at a time.

       Taking life's dark moments in small increments help us to stay present.  It is less likely we will be overwhelmed.  We are confounded when we try to take on the entire elephantine nature of a problem.  Approaching it in bite-sized portions is emotionally easier on the psyche.  It is even easier when our Balcony People are at our side, rooting us on.

       Balcony People stick by us. They lift us up, after being sucker punched by the unexpected vicissitudes of life.  This is when we are thankful for the support we get when we have a supportive network.

       We learn from the experience, strength and hope of our good friends.  Their smiles, wisdom and compassion provide the connection needed.  During the stressful seasons of life---when we falter, they, our Balcony People, lift us up.

       They uphold us as we place one unsteady foot in front of the other.  Sharing their experience, strength and hope with us is invaluable. You might want to read here, for more about this critical source of support.

       Wonderful con-versations with a family member or connecting with others committed to our welfare heals emotional bruises.  These sores accu-mulate quickly when we are trying to grow.

       These bruises may pop up when we face an unpleasant task. This may happen when we take gigantic steps in our growth. One source of healing during these stretching times is giving ourselves credit.  When trying to grow, often we are facing our fears.  Or we may be overcom-ing old scars.

       When addressing daunting issues, we are taking care one of the most important persons in our lives.  Ourselves.  During stressful times, we need to take whatever steps are necessary to treat ourselves with care.

       This means Quiet Time.

       When we apply this time, we are taking care of yours truly.  Eating healthy meals.   Exercising.  Sleeping well may be what is needed to take off the edge of demanding days.

Listening to music, being with friends and making time for fun (even if we don't feel like it) are ad-ditional ways of nurturing ourselves.  Such action is critical when facing dis-tasteful, scary, circum-stances.

       Caring for ourselves in this loving way, being gentle towards ourselves, is the antidote to pres-sure.  It is a terrific tonic for tension.

       During stressful times this is when we need to especially focus on our needs. We have to be at our best.  This is possible when we nurture our souls. We become strong-er when we give attention to our physical needs.  We are the only person on earth who can make our welfare our number one priority.

      We accomplish this by connecting with our network of good com-pany.  We will also have greater success during life's crucible moments when we slow down to tend to ourselves.

How About You? 
1. How have you received support this week?
2. Has there been an area in your life where you are experiencing more clarity?

Exercising Faith and Taking Action: I Hope to See More Pleasant Scenery 9/6/12

Image: "Autumn Pond"by Tim Blessed. Copyrighted photograph

    Welcome to our guests from Russia, the U.S., China, the Ukraine, Poland and Indonesia.  Thanks for returning every day. My Russian guests outnumber all others. I don't know how you

A Soft Word Turns Away Wrath .....................9/5/12

"It is not whether your words or actions are tough or gentle; it is the
 spirit behind your actions and words that announces your inner state."
-- Chin-Ning Chu 

    Yesterday I disagreed with a columnist who works for a local paper. He published my comments in his blog, which is affiliated with the paper, The Press Democrat, perhaps the most popular blog the paper has.  The following is

A Full and Joyous Day, Experiencing Support From All Sides. Also, Sarcasm Confronted Publicly, In Print ................................9/5/12

Image: "Cumbria: Over Rydal Lake" by Tim Blessed. Copyrighted photograph. 

   Tuesday, a columnist for a local newspaper wrote the following. Don't get too caught up with the content. I just want to share my

Checking In

   Good morning,

I've been up since 4:15 a.m. That's too early for me.

I'm dealing with

I Had My Best Fall, Enjoying Freedom from Debby Downers---Emotional Vampires ..............9/2/12

This is no fun when this happens, as it did on July 4th this year. I bruised
 my ligament and didn't walk well for three weeks. Today, I had more luck. 

My Gratitudes for Sunday:
1.  I fell from my bike again. This time it was along the grassy entrance to a golf course.  It was interesting; it didn't

Alexander the Grey(t) Part III, Lessons Learned from a Dying Semi-Paralyzed Cat .................................9/6/12

     Hello again,

I hope you are having a terrific Sunday. Mine has been pretty good.

      Recently, I've posted two parts that belong to a series I wrote about a dear friend.  I see some have

Adding to Peace, One Moment at a Time, Even When Exhausted ....... 9/2/12

How blessed and good it is when brethren
 dwell together in unity.    Psalms 133:1

The hills in my neighborhood. I used to roam among

 these trees and still do, from time-to-time. 

    Good morning,

How are you?  As an aside, I reworked yesterday's post, adding links and additional comments. You might want to revisit it. It is another example of

God Doing For Me What I Could Not Do For Myself ................................9/1/12

Image: "Lakeside: Rudyard Lake" by Tim Blessed

       Whew! Was today an unforgettable day.  Where do I start?  Most of you know that I remember things, words, facial expressions, formations in clouds, images. My mind takes snapshots of life's events.

      Today,