 |
“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive
the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move
forward.” Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
Image: "Wetlands: Autumn Sunshine by Tim Blessed. Copyrighted photograph.
|
about this subject, I also:
1. Do inventories. I'll consider the lessons learned. This normally leads to exercising new alternatives to unhealthy behavior. Writing out what happened on paper stops me from perseverating---having my thoughts continually run through my mind.
2. Write a letter to the person who has troubled me, even if they are dead. Expressing my feelings in this way is cathartic. Afterwards, I burn my written thoughts, turning over these feelings to the God of my understanding.
3. I'll use a helium balloon. I'll write what troubles me on it, using a Sharpie pen I'll go out to a park and release it. (I buy a biodegradable balloon.) This ritual helps. Each time I find myself drawn to my past, I remind myself of this exercise---I've placed my concerns in God's hands.High and Low Points for This Week
This is the end of the week. As I occasionally do in this inn, I wonder, what was your high point and low point for this week? Today's a good time to pause and take stock. Like me, you can share more than one, if you want.
My High Points:
1. I'm removing clutter by filing papers. I appreciate the order it creates.
2. I didn't accept unacceptable behavior. Someone tried telling me what to do and I calmly asked him to stop doing that. I was with a person who continually complained; I lovingly detached from that person.
3. I wrote letters this week. Self-expression is one way of taking care of myself. As a child I wasn't allowed to voice my opinion. It's refreshing, communicating what concerns me, in a loving way.
4. I enjoyed my time with a new client.
5. I fixed my bike. I look forward to riding it today!
6. Today, I'm going to a Day In Al-Anon event. I look forward to being with others I know and attending up-beat, positive workshops. I'll ride my bike the event is fifteen miles away.
My Low Points:
1. Coming to terms with the disappointing behavior of others. It returns me to sanity when I remember I'm powerless over others and their actions, or lack of action. I grieve my losses and spend time with those who meet my need for companionship, fun, communication and connection.
2. I'm haven't accomplished all I wanted to do this week. That's okay. I need to be gentle with myself. Going through stress doesn't have me at my best. I need to remember this.
3. I'm not sleeping well. I'll try exercising more and taking steps to ensure greater sleep.
Okay, I've shared my highs and lows, what are yours??
Posts
2 comments:
Dear Innkeeper,
Forgiving myself and others helps me move beyond my past.
Letting go of anger, hurt and resentment help too.
Imagining the pain and suffering those who may have hurt me, or others, are stuck in, helps me to forgive them, and move on as well. Standing in my so-called enemies shoes is good for my soul.
I'm reminded of a slogan that helps me with this..."Forgiveness is giving up hope for a better past." I love that one! Another one is, "Would I rather be right or be happy?" I choose happiness, which is contrary to the judgmental, critical approach of my recent past.
My Gratitudes for today, and the past few days are;
1. For deciding to go the extra mile at work, and go in at 5am for two hours, on my day off (today) in order to put out some fires. A colleague I needed to impact was inadvertently moved.
2. For spending a "Harvesting the Fruits of Recovery" day today with a large group of friends sharing our experience, strength and hope; laughing, crying, growing and healing.
3. For a deeply relevant (for me and my wife), Tolstoy quote shared during a workshop on Detachment; "I sit on a man's back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means - except by getting off his back."
This brilliant thought is followed by an anonymous prayer; "Teach me to leave to others their inborn right to dignity and independence, as I wish to have them leave mine to me."
4. Grateful I could be moved to tears by the heartfelt sharing of one friend who is going through the painful process of continuing to learn better how to detach with love; detach not amputate! If I heard nothing else (and there was so much more...) at today's "Harvest...," I would have left blessed beyond my expectations!
Hello Carl,
Hearing your healthy reactions to hurt is amazing. You are sparing yourself from the tremendous harm we suffer when we are bitter or resentful.
I bet your recovery was strengthened, because of the event you attended Saturday. Your quotes are powerful, more people would experience emotional healing, if they got the insights you did at your workshops.
I am in agreement with you. Overcoming disappointments and our character defects is much better than pouting or trying to control others.
Post a Comment