It was interesting noticing my response while trapped in an emotionally intense moment, with a very angry man. He is wrestling with issues that existed way before I ever knew him. I was thankful that I maintained my
equanimity.
It wasn't easy.
I love that, now, I usually respond and don't react when thrust into less than ideal circumstances. I took care of myself. The slogan "DETACH", came to mind, as I wrestled with someone else's emotional demons.
It's acronym is:
Don't
Even
Think
About
Changing
Him/Her.
It helped me keep things in perspective: I didn't take his behavior personally.
How About You?
What do you do when you find yourself in an intense situation, with another person? How do you cope? Or, do you cope?
I hope you're having a great day,
Posts
6 comments:
Hi Pablo! I usually try to diffuse the situation in any way that I can and try to keep my emotions in check. Of course this is sometimes easier said than done.
Hello Pablo :o),
this post comes at the right time for me.In fact,during the last few days an exclamation came often to my mind: WORK HARD,HAVE FUN,NO DRAMA!
I found it once somewhere on the internet and in my opinion it really summs up how I feel about drama.
Some months ago,I was involved in a big drama between two of my girlfriends and believe me it was pure hell.I got so emotional that I needed to rest for two days,during which I was thinking a lot about what happened and I felt so sad.It was at that exact time that I decided I am never going to let other's people or mine drama get the hold of me.It is good to take some time to think about things,but to dwell upon them is just a waste of time.Reaction is much better!
However,as also Optimistic Existentialist said,this is much easier said than done.Detachment takes practice!
Now if I find myself in a "dramatic" situation,I just try to stay calm and to ignore the drama and I continue to do my thing.For example,if somebody is rude to me and trys to manipulate me,I would just change the subject of the converstion and say something completely out of the blue like: 'Hey,would you like to have an ice-cream ;))?'
Or,I also found myself saying: 'Hm,you seem to be very nervous and stressed out,maybe you should try and go to India and visit a real yoga centre there ;))!'
I think I would try to solve the "dramatic" situation only after things have calmed down a bit,or who knows,maybe I would just let it be.Sometimes that's the best way out!
Many greetings :)!
I like that acronym for Detach. So very true! I generally state what I am feeling when someone is difficult. I want to honestly state my feelings without judging another or blaming.
Hi Keith!
Thank you, for dropping by. I like it, when you do. I feed off of your positivity. The innkeeper likes being encouraged, too.
I hope you are doing well. Btw,how did that date go for you? You know, the one you had months ago.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this post's content. I always look forward to your visits and will keep the lights on for you.
Hello Jasmina, :0>
It's great having you back. I'm in total agreement with you. I'd add, it's important to maintain balance.
Good for you---you have come up with wonderful boundaries, you are learning to detach.
You might want to take a look at a post of mine. You can find it in the right side-bar. It's one of the most popular for this month. It's title is "Responding Not Reacting, Part I" It's subtitle is "Calmness In the Midst of the Emotional Storm." It may help you, regarding dramatic moments.
Hey, your approach would work for me---I love ice cream!
Not only would your suggestion about the vexing visiting yoga help, it would keep that person from being nearby! Pretty creative idea. :->
Thanks for your visit. I really appreciate when you drop by the inn!
Syd,
I like the DETACH acronym, too. I love slogans. They are kernels of wisdom, packed with healthy principles. They help me maintain my serenity, if I apply them.
I'm in agreement with you, about expressing ourselves. I've found it's best sharing the need I have, that lie beneath my feelings. I believe all negative emotions are a result of an unmet need.
I've discovered that people are more inclined to hear me out, when I use that approach.
Thank you for dropping by. You always add to this inn, when you do.
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