 |
| Switzerland: Mountain Farm |
A new week is starting. This is a good time for reflecting upon the past week. With that in mind,
My Gratitudes For Today:
1. I wrote the photographer who took the following picture.Isn't it beautiful? The composition and lighting if amazing. It looks like a painting, doesn't it?
Tim Blessed is the photographer. He wrote back, giving me permission to use his pictures. Ya ay! I'm thrilled; his photos will add beauty to this inn. I'm grateful he's allowing me permission to publish his work.
2. Monday, I look forward to my car being repaired. It's in the garage. In the meantime, getting around is limited.
3. Soon, I'll have a nicer environment which will allow my business to be more productive. The improvements are happening later this month.
4. I'm grateful for priorities. They help me stay focused. I got a lot done: today was a work day for me.
5. I'm delighted that I was able to send a letter to a dear friend. I've tried five times in the past week. My computer needs repair. Each time I wrote a letter to my friend, my computer froze. I'd lose what I wrote. It's been an opportunity for me to practice patience, diligence and self-forgiveness.
6. I'm still glowing due to the time I enjoyed last night. My friend spoke. More details are in yesterday's post. I'm thankful for fellowship, community and learning.
Guarding Our Emotional Sobriety
Recently, someone tried engaging me in an argument. I stopped it, cold. I don't care for unnecessary arguments, nor do I want unasked for criticism. I asked the person: "Is there a reason that prompts you to argue with me? Would it be possible for you to respect my opinion, instead of trying to change it?" She stopped.If she was trying to endear herself to me, it didn't work. :-> I prefer relating with those who allow me freedom regarding my likes and dislikes. So, what prompted this interaction? Earlier, in our conversation, I said I liked a James Taylor, the singer and musician. She said so-and-so was better.The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
I didn't ask for her opinion or her correction. She can have her tastes in music; I just don't want hers imposed on me. I never gave her permission to judge my musical tastes. I prefer making my own choices, having my own values and exercising my autonomy.
My response was a result of staying present in the conversation. I've learned that, for every year we work intensively on our personal growth, we get one second of response time. (For more thoughts about improvements, click here.) I've been doing that for seven years. That gave me seven seconds. That's all that was needed to keep my stability, not get triggered, during my conversation with this person.
I'm thankful for a sense of humor that allows me to not get caught up in other people's issues. Instead of getting irritated with this person, I saw the situation as silly.
It's great relief asking ourselves, when something troubles us, "how important is it?" Getting angry at another person wasn't worth losing my emotional sobriety. I'm glad we don't need to take other people's behavior personally. How a person behaves is a reflection of their values and personal history. It has nothing to do with us.
That was seven more gratitudes:
1. Knowing how to prevent an argument.
2. I stood for my values instead of being passive.
3. I'm grateful for being gentle when differing with another.
4. I appreciate being internally referented in the above situation---I adhered to my values and wasn't swayed; my emotions weren't triggered.
5. I'm glad I see situations as humorous that at one time would have annoyed me.
6. I celebrate not allowing anger to control me.
7. I'm encouraged I have emotional and psychological distance--also known as detaching with love.
Separating in this way allows me the space needed to consider my options.
Posts
2 comments:
Despite your computer crashing 17 times, this post still came out ok ;) Except that the photo you posted is not complete.
"How important is it?" O my, I need to think of this one much more often..
Hope your computer gets fixed properly, so you can continue sharing all that you do.
Thanks for the feedback. I'll see if I can fix the picture. Another thought that helps me: we get what we tolerate. In order for that thought to be effective, however, I need to know my values.
It helps to know, in advance, what are my must haves and can't stands in a relationship. That way, I'll know better when my boundaries are violated.
Post a Comment