Monday, September 15

Eighth Characteristic that Prevents Having A Healthy Relationship..... .................. 9/15/14

At this age it is okay, wearing a cape.  Any
 older, it isn't advised to be a constant rescuer
     We have looked at factors that make us choose unhealthy relationships. Next is number eight:

Rescuing:
    Our need to fix others becomes our fix.  We binge on helping others as an alcoholic binges on drinking. The problem with this type of relationship is the lack of balance.  I frequently relate with people who expect me to be available at all times.  When I cut off a
conversation, they take offense, even though the conversation has been lengthy as it is.

     I was not put on this earth to constantly serve. If I don't take care of my needs I will have nothing to offer, when I do help.  What allows me to separate from constant service is detaching with love.  Part of life is for the vulner-able to experience their challenges, being responsible for themselves.  There are lessons they will only learn by processing life's difficulties. Realizing there is only one God and I am not Him provides me with the sanity to see this fact and step away.

    If we are not careful, needy people will deplete us of our energy, our reserves.  Our emotional and physical love banks will go dry.  Unchecked, they become unsafe people.  Besides, God wants me to have enjoy life, not be a constant slave, neglecting self.

    Usually, we learn rescuing early in life.  Frequently we related with others who were needy.  The truth is that we must live our lives.  It isn't our obligation to remedy all the problems others have.

    We get what we tolerate.  It is a form of abuse giving people a sense of entitlement---that we will always bail them out.

How About You? 
Who do you need to stop rescuing? 

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Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.

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