Sunday, August 3

Taking Care of My Needs, Reassured I Am Not Crazy ..... 8/3/14

   Yes, it is that moment. Time for the weekly roundup, sharing the high and low points for the last seven days.  Was your week inspiring?  Or did it produce an upside down smile?  Mine was phenomenal.  Excellent, even.  Here is how it looked:

High Points
1.  Connecting with others, faster, and more clearly, will take place as of this upcoming Monday, when using the internet.  There will be less frustration, when using Skype.  This week I took steps, making this happen.

      I am grateful for seeing reality, a problem I had, and fixing it.  Life will improve, making a happier innkeeper.

Being Vulnerable
2.  I was transparently honest yesterday, even cried.  Years ago, that was not my reality.  Oh, I could be honest.  But it was harder doing so.  It made me feel vulnerable.  One form of vulnerability is asking for something.  It is a moment where we are either like we are in a child-like state or we reveal the inner adult.

There Is A Difference
     Without recovery, it can feel awkward, asking for something. We may feel like s seven year old, looking to another, to meet our needs.

     When we work on our personal growth, we see our needs.  It is a sign of strength, not immaturity, to get them met. This is not being codependent. When we are codependent, we take care of everyone else's needs, ignoring our own, thinking we are being noble.  We aren't.

      If we make a request, there is the chance that our needs may be met. If we don't, there is zero chance of that.  Taking care of our needs feeds our inner adult, striding away from passivity. Is is no longer living in a child-like, dependent-upon-the-whims-of-others state to have our needs met.
3.  A busy but fulfilling week was had.  Many intense, but intensely good conversations.  I am glad I serve others.  I like being effective, helping others become the person they want to be.
4.  Investing in myself.  I spent hours writing.  It clears my mind. So much percolates within my soul that emptying out on paper invigorates me, discharging energy while simultaneously providing clarity. Writing orders my mind and helps me keep my equanimity.
5.  I am resting more.  It is a form of celebrating life. Taking care of myself allows me to make the most of the day.  When I have time off, I can cycle, spend time with friends because I am not worn out.  I also can think more clearly, when doing research.
6.  I received an inspiring letter.  Far different from any others I get.  Connecting with someone who speaks the same emotional language encourages me.  Being with someone like-minded and spirited lets me know I am not mad.

       I knew I was not.  But life was awfully lonely and almost nauseating as a child.  I trusted my inner sense of direction, even when others---society, church and school forcefully fed me an unpalatable perspective, incongruent with my bearings----how I saw life.

       As  youth, I was forced to speak superficially----concretely.  If I was too intense, intuitive or abstract, others mocked, telling me I was weird.  I was not.  I was simply a swan swimming with ducks.  Relating with people who see things the same way lifts my spirit, like the person who sent the letter I received this week.   The missive and language shared reinforced my faith in me, and my world view.

Low Points:
1.  I need to sleep regularly. Not happening.  Fitful sleep throws my day off.
2.  I need to make more time for research.
3.  I am not asserting my boundaries as much as I should. Especially with those who take advantage of me.
4.  I have been worn out this week because of number 1 above.

May you have a great and grateful day,

                     The Innkeeper

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Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.