Monday, August 4

Disappointment...... 8/4/14

        Awhile back, I encountered a big-time disappoint-ment.  It was a surprise requiring time to process, emotionally, mentally.  I had to handle my sadness and anger, because I was misled.

        What did I learn from that awful
time?  How about this:

1.  I discovered I was maturing. I took care of me.  I did not accept the unacceptable behavior I faced.
2. I was reminded of the value of boundaries.
3.  I was present, saying what I felt and wanted.  It was not easy, communicating disappointment and irritation, to the perturbing person.
4.  Sharing my dismay----with her lack of candor and transparency was making amends to me.  I was not tolerating unacceptable behavior.

         An unpleasant revelation unfolded, making me uncomfortable relating with this individual.  The amazing music from the symphony of our friendship screeched to a hideously sounding and unexpected halt when the needle of unexpected truth dug across the LP of our relationship.

         The lack of honesty troubled, frustrated me.  Being misled made me sad, tightening my heart, taking the breath out of me.  I shut down.  Deceit and sins of omission are as welcome as a blister on my foot, the day before running a marathon.

         Perspective bred from years of personal growth, I am grateful for.  I'm thankful for holding all relationships with an open hand.  Discovering this person's nature after a month-and-a-half of relating, was sobering and good.  There is only one thing worse than being deceived forty-five days: being hoodwinked for forty-six.  I appreciate having a healthy Pablo Piper People Picker.  It protected me, giving needed perspective, freeing me from an unhealthy relationship.

         What I wrestle with is knowing that it's important to accept the bad, along with the good.  I was willing to do that with this person.  No one is perfect.  The conflict is also having clarity, honesty, integrity in a relationship.  That didn't happen here.  That was my quandary.   With sadness, I moved on.  That was strengthening my welfare.  I am glad I did. W e get what we tolerate.  A lack of authenticity does not a good relationship make.

How About You? 
How do you know when to let go of a relationship?  For me, I don't care for deceit.  I'd love hearing your thoughts

1 comment:

Optimistic Existentialist said...

I let go of a relationship when holding onto it would be damaging to my self-respect. I think we all kind of know internally when that is happening, even if it takes our hearts a little longer to catch up with what our heads already know...

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