Saturday, May 24

My Heart Sings

    Intimacy isn't sex.  Many times sex is the furthest thing from intimacy.  Instead it can devolve into the selfish exploi-tation of another to satisfy our-selves.  Love can wait to give. Lust can't wait to get.

       Being present, vulnerable and relating with others, deeply, is where intimacy is
found.  My bonding with others in this way has moved into overdrive, a level not known a few years ago.  Such soul-satisfying times is one benefit of my work.  It drives me to greater levels of growth and enrichment.

       Connecting with loved ones---which includes true, not Facebook or cyber friends, who usually are acquaintances, not friends----has improved dramatically over the first half of this year.  Spending time with people in real time, face-to-face, as they reveal their vulnerabilities is the stuff of intimacy.

       There is no boasting, presenting ourselves as more than we are. We run on regular, not premium.  It feels good.  Being loved for being ourselves is terrific.  There is no strain, no impressing one another.

        Recently, I observed the true nature of someone who was within my inner circle.  Time revealed the sincerity I thought existed was actually a mask for her attempts to exploit me.  When faced with such a disappointment I do what I suggest for others to do when faced with insincerity and betrayal.  


        I am thrilled to know the true nature of this person, discovering this fact before investing more time with her.  There is only one thing that is worse than being manipulated by someone for a year-and-a-half.  Being used for a year-and-a-half and one day.   That isn't happening.  That makes a happy even-though-mistreated innkeeper.

        Today, I related with someone.  Four-and-a-half hours sped by. The hours disappeared as we discussed challenges.  This was the best time I had this month.  I mentioned concerns.  She, in turn, shared area's of vulnerability.

        My response was loving her more, seeing more clearly the preciousness in her.  She is realizing that perhaps I love her more than she does herself.  She was surprised and happy.  The beautiful smile she displayed while visiting with the innkeeper was more than enough reward for whatever I offered.

       This is relating.  Being present with what is, be it painful or pleasant.  It is not appearing more relaxed or confident than we are. It is authenticity come alive.  It is being transparent and genuine.  It is knowing that we don't have to be more than we are to be loved.   Life doesn't get better than this.  This is the stuff that makes our heart sing.   And mine is.

How About You?  
How are you growing in your relationships?

     Drop by again, later.  It's late.  I'm tired.  I'll work on this some more, later, Sunday. Once I arrive in Mendocino with my son.

     Wishing you a great and grateful Sunday,


1 comment:

Teresa said...

I agree that connecting with loved ones and safe people authentically is much more satisfying for my soul than the facades people put out on facebook etc,

Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.