I stated what I needed. The powers that be, are responding to my request. One thing I've learned over time is that I need to take responsibility for life's disappointments, even if someone else causes them. Yes, I'm the one responsible for coping with them.
If I say to a person who upsets me, "until you change from doing x,y and z, I'll be angry, unhappy, (put in your anticipated negative response)," I'm surrendering my happiness and serenity over to that individual. I've just stated that my joy is based upon their reaction. Not a good deal.
This person may not have the ability, or consciousness to meet my needs. In today's meeting, I was assured that I'll get an answer to my request within a few days. Good, I like that response.
When facing unsatisfactory circumstances, I consider my options. Applying positive alternatives is crucial for my mental health. If I'm discouraged, I can spend time with good friends. Exercising provides an additional outlet for stress.
I can listen to music I love or call a Balcony Person for a supportive ear. Praying, journaling or walking in the countryside are other ways of nurturing myself when frustrated or my nerves are frayed.
There are many things I can do to have the serenity needed, in order to personally thrive. I'm less exasperated when I'm aware that happiness is a choice; it's not based upon what other people say or do. Focusing on troubles and disappointments only makes them loom larger and more disturbing.
Staying in the solution allows me to have an Attitude of Gratitude. Taking constructive action towards overcoming a disappointment allows me to create a better today.
"Acting like a victim is a choice, not a destiny."
Here's to making healthy choices,
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2 comments:
Try doing this when your almost 8-year-old makes weekly mass an exercise in humiliation!
Before you ask your child to do something, Marshall Rosenberg suggests asking yourself these two questions ...
The first question is: "What do you want your child to do?" As you answer this first question, it may be clear that using rewards or threats can get your child to do what you want.
The second question is: "What do you want your child's reasons to be for doing it?" When you consider this question, you will see that using power over children will not create a safe, trusting and connected relationship, the kind you can build upon for a lifetime.
These questions help me get perspective as a parent.
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