My view Sunday night. Was it grand. |
I'm feeling better. Yep, you guessed it----happier. It's amazing, the different, concurrent levels of feeling I experience, as never before. Throughout this day my moods pulsed. From elation to
a deep calmness. Knowing recovery, living it, allows me to respond and not catastrophize, when life is not happening as I want.
When disappointed (as I was last week) or angry---which was not my case the past seven days----being petulant may feel good, the moment negative feelings are expressed. And the duration of this angry pleasure lasts how long? Maybe a minute, perhaps two. But, the consequences for letting the raging stream of negativity to gush forth is not worth of damage it causes us or others.
Like the waves that surged and crashed, finally ebbing back into Half Moon Bay, so it was emotionally within me, today. I spent the evening at this town that hugs the shore. Watching the cloud-shrouded sun sink into the western reaches of the Pacific was a treat for a cyclist who treks have been limited to 24 miles, and no farther. Nope, my bike hasn't touched the Californian shore in more than two years.
I took in the view above while enjoying the evening with a friend wrapped in a blanket. She wore a sleeveless top; my friend forgot to bring a jacket. Being a cyclist and made for Mediterranean climes, I was prepared. Vest, sweater, multi-colored windbreaker, cotton gloves and an open faced ski mask served me well.
Immersed in mist, and the panoramic view of the jagged Californian coast, my mind floated back in time, reflecting upon this morning's conversation.
Then, I noticed I have grown since the last time I was in a relationship. I clearly expressed my truth, kindly. I discussed life-transforming issues. Calmly. Her response was amazing.
I am different. Improved. Am I glad.
This evening I was distracted. The tide of this morning's conversation, ongoingly slapped the shores of my consciousness as I strolled along the Californian coast with my evening companion. I was, by turns, alternatingly stunned and happy, as I took in the pungent smell of kelp and listened to the crunch of sand as I walked along the shore.
Gratitudes for Sunday:
1. For a thrilling conversation this morning.
2. For the serenity I have when I stay present and am sensitive not only to the needs of others, but am aware of mine, too.
3. For the majestic roar of the ocean, the beauty of a sunset along the coast. For the comical short-legged scurrying of Starlings, as they probed the shoreline, looking for food.
4. For the bookending nature of the day. It started with an amazing conversation and it ended the same way.
5. For the seafood restaurant where we enjoyed dinner. Better yet, was the authenticity and honesty as we chatted about relationships.
May you have a great and grateful Monday!
Pablo
3 comments:
Thank you, Pablo.
-Superman
What an amazing photo ;) and haha who would forget a jacket when visting Half Moon Bay.....
I am thankful for.....the colors and pictures found in the stained glass windows of my church.....I see something new every time I look at them
For being blessed to work with little children...they simply amaze me ;)
For my Son.....and his ability to continually amaze me....and keep me grounded.....for when I look at him....at his current age.....he looks like my Father, at 20
For the beautiful flowers in bloom....for the tulips that had seen better days in our lunchroom....I replanted them....there will be a little surprise next Spring ;)
Dear Superman,
It is my pleasure serving you. You do so much for others, the least I can do is provide a couch and hearth for you to rest by.
I value your sensitivity. We need more people like you in the world. Really. I hope you find time to invest in yourself; you give so much, for so many.
An appreciative innkeeper,
The Innkeeper :->
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