An Alameda home |
express my feelings at any time, any where.
Just, to let you know, even now, when I read what I wrote about my friend Alexander the Grey(t) I still cry, on occasion. And I'm glad I do.
He meant much to me. I value quiet, loyal, persistent love received from another. I will talk about emotions in a minute.
Work was fine, delightful, even. This week I've been consumed with sessions. As an antidote for the intense week, I cycled for 20.2 miles (32.5 km) today, after my last session this morning. I rode from Castro Valley, through the Lake Chabot Regional Park to Alameda.
I needed to ride, my body craved it. Exercise discharges the residue (nokosaretamono) of feelings I have after meeting with clients----I get invested in the work I do.
It helps prevent the frustration or possible anger (ikari), kowai (fear) or emotional poison (gedokuzai) that develops when we allow stress to fester within.
I had several adventures as I cycled home. One source for excitement was getting my leather jacket caught in a wheel on my bike, as I rode along. I wasn't wearing it, it slipped from my rack on the back of my bike, into the grips of rear wheel. I'll need saddle soap to clean it off.
Also, I was a split-second away from crashing my steel steed at a crazy, pot-holed intersection in Oakland. Wow. I somehow averted that, righting my bike while surrounded by whizzing cars, bad pavement and fifteen pounds of books on my bike rack. That made balancing my bike a tad more difficult as I wheeled and willed myself from kissing the asphalt road.
As I was slipping----falling----I course-corrected without thinking. That's a rarity for me. I'm usually in my head, when cycling. "Oh, I'm falling!" I usually think, when I'm about crash.
I was present this morning, when this fall almost happened. My instincts and split-second reactions, not analysis, took over today. Am I glad. My body thanks me, too. For three to five minutes, afterwards, my heart raced with the fear of what almost occurred----my mind processing the morning's dangerous encounter. That was more drama than I care having.
Whew. I could not duplicate this morning corrective maneuver if I tried. Ya ay, no new scars on my body!
................
It doesn't take much for me to be happy, simple pleasures will do. In today's case, it was buying a new water bottle that I can use when cycling. It's made by Camelbak (sic), the best brand, in my opinion.
A different bottle I had. I'm glad I lost it within a month. It wasn't a Camelbak, and I hated it. It was a struggle to drink from. The new one has a "no leak" feature and it pours easily. It may seem like nothing to you, but when riding for an hour to two hours, as I do several times a week, water comes in handy. This is my fourth new water bottle in a year.
After getting home from work, I had a dreaded appointment. Bone weary, I was. I did what I had to do. After it was over, I sat on a nearby bench, drifting off into space, grateful that finally I could rest."Abundance is not in how much we have, but in how much we enjoy."
I enjoyed the mindlessness of it all as I overlooked Pampas grass, a field, the setting sun, squirrels scurrying and the cloud-filled sky. The cool breeze from the Pacific Ocean wafted over me was a nice touch.
Another home in my neighborhood. |
After arriving at home, I laid down on my bed and drifted off until................"ring!!" I got a call from my oldest son. It was worth it, disturbing my sleep, hearing from him. I had taken a three hour nap. I was that bushed.
..........
Today, I received a letter from a new friend. It made my day. I replied. What I like about life, is allowing its twist and turns to provide journeys I would have never considered, if I had my way. It's so much better, when I let go and let God rule my life.
..........
This morning, I met with clients. I was able to practice and develop my Japanese, a language I learned when attending college. When at the university, I only had Japanese roommates from Japan, not Japanese Americans. If they spoke to me in English I'd ignore them. I'd hang out with their Japanese national friends and learned conversational Japanese.
Today, I learned several complicated words, as this morning's clients and I processed the abuse the husband received as a little boy, through his adolescence and young adulthood. One of them is from Japan. It was fun growing in my knowledge of that language.
The time was productive. I was happy to serve.
............
My Gratitudes for Friday
1. I napped. Ease, comfort, rest were a welcome tonic for an intense week.
2. I rode my bike at length today. I love connecting with nature. All between me and the earth is a simple frame and two wheels. I'm up higher than a car, my breathing is easier than when I run and I can reach speeds of 27-30 mph, when I want, with my cruising being at 14 mph.
3. I enjoyed receiving a letter. I'm all for community, healthy communication and companionship with a like-minded individual.
4. The stroll home on my bike, both, after I worked this morning and later, after I took care of a commitment in the afternoon took me to places that I can't get to, any other way, and I mean emotionally.
5. My body is worn out. I feel the soreness in my shoulders. I worked especially hard this week. It's therapeutic, working hard, exercising my office and seeing positive results.
6. I loved my conversation on the phone with my son. We even prayed at the end of our talk.
7. I cried. I think I'll expand on this a bit in my next post. I'm too tired for now. Suffice it to say........
Yes, I'm aware most men are not emotional. That's their problem.
3 comments:
Dear Innkeeper,
Tonight I am grateful;
1. For the miracle of modern medicine and 21st Century surgical practices.
2. To have returned home from the hospital with my new knee last night.
3. To be able to walk with a walker, stand and sit, with some effort.
4. For the loving and patient care and support of my wife, family and friends.
5. To be reminded that all healing and recovery, physical, emotional and spiritual is step, by step, one day at a time!
Dear Carl,
I don't think I've replied any sooner than I am, now. Great hearing from you. I'm glad you are doing well.
Take it easy, get plenty of rest. Surrounded by family and friends----recovery can't ask for a better environment.
This new year, may you step out into areas of growth and fulfillment that are beyond your wildest dreams!
Glad that you didn't fall. I like those old Victorian homes. Very pretty.
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