Restoring The Years the Locust Have Eaten Through Service, the Healing Power of God's Love (200th Post) ........................10/30/11

Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the
recognitionof this is the beginning of wisdom.
Theodore Isaac Rubin

     Good evening everyone,

How was your day?  I'm leaving in a bit to ride my bike.  That will be followed with a work out on the gym I have at home.  The weather was great, my football team won and I got rest.

     I'm giving a presenta-tion Wednesday, of the sort that I have never done before. It's service related in two ways: I'll speak on the value of doing service.  I will also give a report, the result of attending a conven-tion in Squaw Valley.  After more than 20 years of public speaking, I enjoy talking on a new to topic.

     For me, doing community service restores the years the locust have eaten.  "Huh?" you say?  Engaged in service can be healing; with a good organization, I experience the healthy aspects of parenting, especially those qualities lacking in my home, when I grew up.

     I represent a non-profit organization. Those I serve thank me, even when they disagree with my point of view while representing them.  They pay my expenses and appreciate my efforts at doing my best.  Those I represent are supportive.  If I seek advice, they don't tell me what to do.  They relate principles that have helped them, in similar circumstances.  Ultimately, they let me decide.    Man, is that healing.  So different from the way I was reared.

      When I need help, I ask for it and get it.  It's not the kind of domineering "assistance" I received as a child.  That type of parenting hovered over me---- like a helicopter---making sure that I do it right, their way.  That did not suit my need for autonomy.  Even as a child, I needed my independence.

      Now, those I serve may share their experience, strength and hope about what I'm doing, if their perspective is different.  But, they allow me to serve any way I want.  Wow.  I appreciate the flexibility and the respect for my individuality and my decisions on their behalf.   The way I'm treated meets my need for autonomy, dignity, and ease.  I don't care for someone watching over my actions, when working and appreciate others who trust my judgment.

      Being treated with flexibility and respect while serving is healing.   I am the trust and support I that was missing as kid.

Maintaining Balance
      Yesterday morning, I gathered with close friends.  Hearing inspired, authentic, insightful conversation was a terrific way to start my weekend.  I love hearing people celebrating growth in their lives.

      I appreciate balance.  It's great connecting with others, laying aside my work for hours.  Usually, I help others.  It's nice having my needs met.  Laughter, smiles, being with joyous others restores my soul.

     This is a special post, did you know that?  Thanks for sharing this time with me.  As of today, in less than 8 months, seven and a half, to be exact, I've written two hundred.

      I enjoy marking century occasions like these.  It's good to know this inn meets the needs of many.

The Transforming Power of God's Love 
Relating with Balcony People.

      Knowing, relating, with a compassionate, patient, forgiving, gracious, and all empowering God humbles me.  It is wonderful knowing a Higher Power who is more patient towards me than I am towards myself. When my real self is loved and accepted, it come out from hiding, get healed and is transformed. The beast of my inner self is transformed into a prince.

     It's easier revealing the vulnerable side of me when I know a God who loves me as I am, defects and all. I'm thankful for His unconditional love. His love is not a token, or begrudging effort. It is genuinely concerned for my happiness and wholeness.  My connection with Him provides the serenity, harmony and the emotional safety I need. Thank you, God!

     It amazes me knowing others who love me unconditionally---they are incarnational ambassadors of God's regard for me. They are my Balcony People. I'm thankful for this supportive network. I'd be more of a mess without them.
An Offer From the Innkeeper:
     If you'd like to know how you can get your own Balcony People, write me. I'd be glad to share with you things that can be done to grow them.  It takes time.  We don't get them overnight, but they are worth the effort.

1. I appreciate each and everyone of you who drop by this home of praise and thanksgiving.
2. I'm thankful for you who drop by and keep me company with your comments.
3. I'm grateful for second chances. Service allows me to experience being overseen, from a positive perspective.
4. I'm grateful for my relationship with God. Apart from Him, I'm rarely effective.
5. Service as the innkeeper makes me grow and is healing. Thank you for joining my journaling of joys in this inn.

How About You?
1.  Do you do any community service? What organizations do you belong to?
2.  What do you like best about doing service?
3.  Do you have a Higher Power? If so, how would you describe the God of your understanding?
4.  What might be your gratitudes for today?

Image: "Northamptonshire: Spring Vista" by Time Blessed. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Visiting With the Non-Silent Readers

   Hello everyone,

You may want to revisit my previous posting. Click here, if you missed it. I reworked it extensively. I was tired when I first wrote it. Today, I went back and expanded it.

      There are many things we can be grateful for. Can you name any? I want to take care of a few issues before I go any further. Blogger is operating strangely.

Appreciating the Effort of My Sons, Creating New Legacies

The next moment is as much beyond our grasp, and as much in God's care, as that a hundred years away.

Care (worry) for the next minute is as foolish as care for a day in the next thousand years. In neither can

we do anything, in both God is doing everything. (C. S. Lewis)

       Hi everyone,

All day I was on the move. Two clients were seen before I invested the rest of my work week with my sons. I'm going to bed soon as I'm rising early tomorrow.

       My sons were tired by 7:30 p.m. (Today's gratitude number 3 will let you know why.)  We had planned on doing something else at 8:00 p.m. It was obvious they were weary. I know it's best, when

Being an Adult---Saying No Gently, Without Fear, Getting Out of the Fog............................................. 10/26/11

“God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you
 used one to say “thank you?”  William Arthur Ward Please
do so today by posting a gratitude. It will do you good. 

      I love seeing peo-ple grow in aware-ness. Today, I spoke with several consid-ering their options.  They no longer auto-matically accommo-date the needs of others when others make demands.

       Part of being an adult happens when we disa-gree, agreeably.  Expressing our opinion, voicing what we want, creates a great antidote to depression or resentment. If we fear dif-fering with others, we will find ourselves in a one-down relationship. 

       It's frustrating and dis-empowering to yield our values to others.  Often we don't want to create a stink or we fear harming the connec-tion. If someone doesn't respect our values, what type of relationship do we have?

       Yielding to others, in order to please, has an unpleasant impact upon our emotions (we become angry or depressed),  our mental state (we can fall into self-loathing or nega-tivity), and our physical well-being.(think of getting hives, high blood pressure or strokes).

       All such negative conse-quences result from not exercising boundaries.  We do not know how to say our "no" as gently as our yes.  It helps remembering that "no" forms a complete sentence. We have a right to refuse without explanation.

     If someone displays anger because we say no, they reveal much.  They want us to make decisions based upon their reaction, not our principles.  By giving in, we place their personality above our values.  Our emotional health develops when we place principles first.

      Their angry response violates a basic right of ours as adults, the right to make choices.  There's a word when someone uses anger, blame, shame, fear, or guilt to motivate us: manipulation.  It's emo-tional coercion, a form of violence.  

       Giving in to a bully reveals emotional slavery. 

 "Guilty or reluctant compli-          ance is never operating                from love; it is slavery."  

                Changes That Heal, p. 126. 

     When we yield to the coercion of others, we ransom our freedom.  We are surrendering our integrity.  We are not being true to our values.  

     We believe to keep the relationship we have to give in.  Is that in our best interests?  You know the answer. 

     The angry person wants control over our lives and what we choose.  Not a good deal.  When this happens, we should be energized regarding our stance and opposition. 

   

      Their behavior informs us, at least at that moment, he or she is neither considering our opinion nor feel-ings.  We must insist on having reciprocity, bal-ance, and fairness in all our relationships. 

      This is where we need to get out of the FOG, fear, obliga-tion, or guilt.  When we live in the fog we are not operating from love or independence.  Yielding against our wishes only alienates the relationship, creating frustration and resentment within us. 

      For meaningful relationships, we speak our truth calmly, without fear.  When we do, we will have better connections with others.  Because we are letting them bond with whom we really are. 

My Gratitudes

1.  I met with friends this evening. Wariness happens after going through an emotional hurricane Monday.  I saw someone at tonight's event, resolving an issue. I enjoy reducing clutter in the attic of my mind.

2.  I got reimbursed for expenses for com-munity service I do. I appreciate working with others who have integrity and follow through with their responsibilities---in this case taking care of money owed.
3. My two younger sons are joining me Friday for two seminars I'll attend that day. They are serious about wanting to grow in their effectiveness professionally, financially, and in their interactions with others.

     I'm proud to have sons who want to take a serious look at areas where they can grow. I appreciate seeing them continually mature, characterologically, before my eyes. I'm happy we'll be able to share the day together. What a treat. Really.  

     Okay, you know the routine. I ask visitors to please sign the registry by sharing three gratitudes.  Today, if that is daunting, I'll go easy: I'll ask for one. I appreciate the fellowship and community we share when you do comment here. Thanks!

Related Post:

Being Gentle When Expressing Our View

Celebrating Life..10/25/11

      How are you this evening?

Did your day go as well as you planned?  Mine was fine, you might say it was super-charged.

      I got home a little while ago. My sons and I went to Le Mans Karting.

More Drama Than a Movie

This scene is nothing compared to what happened tonight

     I'm happy that we've crossed the 20,000 views threshold in this inn. It tells me this place is meeting needs of the guests who drop by. Hey, give me your best shot, let me know issues you'd like to see

Passing a Special Milestone

       Good afternoon everyone,

I'm getting a little bit excited. The inn has been busy.

A Source of Joy ......10/23/11

“You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.”                    Sarah Ban Breathnach 

       Good evening everyone, 

I'm posting earlier than normal. It's nice having you drop by.  Please let me know how I can make your stay more comfortable.

       I'm tired, the result of a long and busy evening last night. My middle son's birthday was celebrated, to be continued this afternoon, where we'll race go karts and go shopping for clothes.  We're having fun.

       Last night, two rounds of miniature golf were spent as a family. Between rounds we went to one of my favorite ice cream parlors between rounds.(No, it wasn't Fenton's.)  Nothing makes a father's heart as glad and seeing his offspring happy, and us celebrating time together.

My Gratitudes for Sunday:

1. The weather is marvelous. The Bay Area is a glorious place to live.  We don't have humidity, there's plenty of sun and abundant beautiful country all around.
2. My sons and I made plenty of memories last night. Laughter and exuberance filled the cool Bay Area air as we applied ourselves to miniature golf.
3. I appreciate the three free games that were offered to us by the management, at the end of our second round.  It was totally unexpected.  Gifts are always nice.
4. The family enjoyed great tasting ice cream last night. Can't beat that. It's fun indulging in decadent treats from time-to-time.
5. The birthday person and I had a special time, when the evening was over for the rest of the family.  I'm privileged having intimate, warm, loving relationships with my sons.  How could I not have an attitude of gratitude?

       You've heard my gratitudes, would it be possible for me to hear yours? I the enjoy the fellowship we share when you do.  Thanks!

Image: "Countryside: Stony Lane" by Tiim Blessed. All rights reserved, used by permission. 

A Source of Tranquility

    Good afternoon everyone,

My goodness. I've not been able to access my own blog until now. Last night I couldn't, nor this morning.  Do you think my computer have a virus? I could use your help.  

     Please let me know if there's something I can do to remedy this situation. I'm getting locked out of the inn. I'm still getting the message I posted in my last entry. I'm getting the same message when I try to visit other Blogger blogs, too. Is Blogger a victim of its own success, that its system is overwhelmed due to its popularity?

    Can anyone let me know if they're experiencing the same problems? Thanks!

******************************************

   My Gratitudes, While I Can Post Them:

1. I'm getting rest. I'm thankful I'm taking care of my well being.
2. I'm happy about the wonderful time my sons and I shared this past Tuesday, celebrating my youngest son Josiah's birthday. Noting beats celebrating life with family and dear friends.
3. I'm glad that I'm being gentle towards myself. I'm making many adjustments, resetting my weekly schedule. My nature is to resist change. I'm looking at these adjustments as improvements. I appreciate my life is growing in effectiveness, although is is uncomfortable. I'm thankful for acceptance. 
4. Thank you for dropping by. Please tell your friends about this place. They'd probably enjoy the encouragement this inn offers. I value connecting with the guests of this inn and the community we share.
5. I'm thankful for my health. Last year I almost died. In January and February. I had an illness that could have been fatal. I don't  want to take my restored vigor for granted.

My Source of Tranquility

     I'm humbled that I have a strong relationship with God. I try not to set up my agenda or schedule as I see fit. I find tranquility when I surrender my life to God praying only for knowledge of His will and the power to carry it out.

Commit your ways to the Lord and your plans shall be established....The mind of man plans his ways but the Lord directs his steps.   Proverbs 16:3, 9

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    You've heard my gratitudes; may I ask you to share yours?  I look forward to hearing from you.

Image: "Northamptonshire: New Wheat" by Tim Blessed. All rights reserved. Used by permission. 

The Innkeeper Can't Get Into His Inn--What Gives?

    Hi guys,

Can you let me know if you're having the same problems accessing this blog as the innkeeper? I was unable to post last night. I'm getting the notice posted at the top of what you're reading.

    I know right now

Relieving Stress Through Intensity: Go Figure. The Innkeeper Raced a Go Kart Tonight

Actual picture of part of the track

   Hello everyone,

I added to yesterday's post. You might want to take a look at it again.

     I just got in from spending the evening with my sons. Was it great! My arms are a bit sore. We went to the Le Mans Karting Race Track in Fremont and had a blast. Hanging on to the steering wheel

Monday Gratitudes--I've Plenty

    Hi there.

How are  you? This is a crazier time of the year

Freedom from Other People's Judgments. An Overview of Codependency ..... ..................10/14/11

"I have been young, and now I am old; yet
 have  I not seen the righteous forsaken,
nor His seed begging bread."  Ps. 37:25

“When a person doesn’t have gratitude, something is
missing in his or her humanity.A person can almost
be defined by his or her attitude toward gratitude.”
        Elie Wiesel

        How are you?

I'll get to today's subject in just a minute, after today's gratitudes. But first...........
A Provision Perspective that Promotes Peace 

     In this weak economy many are anxious about financial security.  I realize
neither my income nor my job are the source of my provision:

Our Seven Month Anniversary: Thanks for Dropping By

“Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind.”
Lionel Hampton

   How are  you?

Today is a special day. Do you know why?

  How are you?

Here are my gratitudes for Wednesday:

1. The weather was marvelous.
2. I was able to talk with a friend and get support this evening as I discussed decisions I needed to make.
3. I had lunch with friend I've known for fourteen years. We had a tremendous time together.

Dealing with an Emotional Bully, Part III. Maintainng a Solid Stance. Beware of the Rude Manipulator 10/12/11

The guy with the lighter hair must keep a solid stance or he's going to get
taken down. I know from experience & from what I went through last week.

   Good evening everyone,
I'm here. This is the time when I slow down and visit with you, my guests to the Attitude of Gratitude Inn. I have plenty of stories to share. Logging my ruminations in this log hasn't been possible; I've been running ragged

Where Has the Innkeeper Been?

   Good evening everyone,
I'm slipping in my gratitudes while it is still Monday. The past week was busy, both in the inn, and in my life. Two thousand guests passed through this place in seven days. I'm recovering from my trip to Lake Tahoe. I stayed at Squaw Valley for three days,

Majestic Mountains and Me

Squaw Valley.  This is a picture when it has more snow.

       Good evening everyone,

I'm leaving my gratitudes and then I'm conking out. I didn't get much sleep last night.

My Gratitudes for This Lovely Saturday:

1. I'm thankful for traveling safely. With three other friends, we traveled over 220 miles to Squaw Valley. The Winter Olympics have taken place here.
2. An engaging conversation with the driver, Jonathan, made the trip

Checking In

“To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value
the kindness that stands behind the action. Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course. Everything originates
in a will for the good, which is directed at you.  Train yourself never to put off the word or action that allows you to express gratitude.”     Albert Schweitzer

     Hi everyone,

Isn't the photo above absolutely stunning?  For most of the photos I put on the walls of this inn, if you click on them, you'll get a more complete view.

     Just a quick note to those who frequent this inn of positivity. What was your high point for today? For me, it's setting up my gym and working out today. If it doesn't rain, I'll ride my bike after two evening appointments I have tonight.

     I've been getting my sleep and eating Skinny Switch meals, a good thing. Life is good. I'm thankful for God's unconditional love and that of my friends and family.

     I'm grateful that tomorrow my youngest son, Josiah and I will go hear Eric Shifrin play jazz at the Fairmont Hotel in the City by the Bay.

    I'll be in Squaw Valley, Nevada, later this week. It's snowing there, as I speak.

    There, I've shared my gratitudes. Would it be possible for me to hear yours?

                                                  Wishing you the best,

Image: "Switzerland: Ranges" by Tim Blessed. all rights reserved. All of his photos are copyrighted. Used by permission of the artist.

A Lovely Weekend In Spite of Relating with an Angry Man

“What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it – would you be likely to give
them another? Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you
must truly appreciate what you already have.”     Ralph Marston

    Good evening everyone,

My Gratitudes for Monday:

1. I've been riding my bike. Lately, exercise has been a great way to knock me out at night. I'm sleeping better.
2. Saturday, I witnessed a sunset, while at the beach in Alameda.  I was treated to an amazingly awesome sight:of

Finding Balance During a Busy Month.............. 10/1/11

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our
hearts are conscious of our treasures.”  Thornton Wilder

     Good late evening everyone,

What a month that just concluded.  In September, we had more guests to this inn than the previous six months combined. More than half of our viewers