Friday, October 28

Appreciating the Effort of My Sons, Creating New Legacies

The next moment is as much beyond our grasp, and as much in God's care, as that a hundred years away.
Care (worry) for the next minute is as foolish as care for a day in the next thousand years. In neither can
we do anything, in both God is doing everything. (C. S. Lewis)
       Hi everyone,

All day I was on the move. Two clients were seen before I invested the rest of my work week with my sons. I'm going to bed soon as I'm rising early tomorrow.

       My sons were tired by 7:30 p.m. (Today's gratitude number 3 will let you know why.)  We had planned on doing something else at 8:00 p.m. It was obvious they were weary. I know it's best, when
with others, to make decisions by consensus. (Tradition 1.)

       My sons are adults. I respect this fact; more importantly, I love them. Lording over them, because I'm their father, has no appeal.

       They have been my equal since they were sixteen.  We scrapped our original plans. As long as I'm not violating my boundaries, maintaining a healthy, respectful relationship usually precedes whatever I may want to do when I'm with others.  I care more about the relationships involved than I do about any task, when relating with others.

       For additional information about my relationship with my sons, you might want to take a look at the "My Family" section of the sidebar on your right or you might want to check out "Seeing My Son Soar." 

      My sons and I went home. We played with my first YouTube video presentation, "Dealing with an Emotional Bully." When it comes to technical assistance regarding computers, I deferred to them; the younger generation take to this stuff like breathing. I know my limits.

       They laughed several times, watching what I published on YouTube. If you see the beginning of this video, you'll get a sense of my humor. During the filming something went wrong and I ad-libbed.  My two younger sons strong-armed me into publishing this presentation. I'm now videographically out there, exposed to the whole world through YouTube.

 They convinced me to post this video despite the following objections:

1. Initially, the camera was not properly focused.
2. I'm not wearing my typical dress shirt.
3.  It was late at night, I was not my usual energetic self
4. My hair isn't combed
5. I didn't prepare the room in which it was filmed  It was supposed to be a test run. I used it to figure out how to use the camera.

     My sons said they liked the YouTube presentation. My sons love me; I trust their judgment  So, I published it. This video is the beginning of a new era for me. It's also complying with what my marketing team told me to do.
"Without counsel purposes are disappointed: but in the multitude of counselors they are established." 
                                                    Proverbs 15:22
       Since I'm a public speaker, the marketing team said publishing video presentations is playing to a strength of mine. "Others will get acquainted with your personality," they said. Viewers will grasp my passion, and see the enthusiasm I have about my vocation, the marketing team advised. So, it's done.


My Gratitudes for Friday

1. Publishing my first video on YouTube. It took technical doing, beyond my abilities. Then again, this blog is an accident. I had no idea what I was doing when I created this cozy inn.
"Courage faces fear and thereby masters it." 
     I bought equipment and learned how to use it. I put one foot in front of the other. I broke the task into bite-sized pieces. Completing this process reminds me of the quote:

"We can never become the person we want to be by remaining the way we are."

I placed principles above my resistance and my personality. "Success depends not merely in how well we do the things we enjoy but in how conscientiously we perform those duties that we don't."  John Maxwell.
2. I overcame my opposition to becoming naked, more exposed, in the cyber world of YouTube. Soon, videos will be embedded here----you'll meet me face-to-face. Imagine that!
3. I can't be prouder of my sons.

      They walked 4.2 miles in order to meet with me today in Alameda, making it possible for us to go to a seminar that helped them grow personally and  professionally.  How many people would do that?

      I'm also grateful their efforts made it possible for us to spend the day and evening together.

4. I'm thankful that my strongly embedded need for autonomy did not prevent me from complying with what I was advised to do by my marketing team.

Creating New, Healthier Legacies---Ya ay!

     My parent's generation, and those that preceded them, usually were of the mind set that they could supervise their children, even when they became an adult. Unfortunately, that is a misunderstanding of the difference between a child and an adult son or daughter.

     I'm deliriously happy knowing that I am powerless over all the nouns and pronouns in my life. I have little need for control. In fact, I'm not too good at controlling my own life. Even there, I need God's help to get through the day, much less, my life.

     When that dragon of controlling others raises its head, I remember to place principles above my personality. Life is easier this non-controlling way, and serene. There's only one God and I am not Him.

Final gratitude: 
5. I'm thrilled about seeing new legacies created in my life.  

      I'm heading for bed.
Image: "Cumbria: Langdale Pikes" by Tim Blessed. All rights reserved. Used by permission. 

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Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.