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| “No one who achieves success does so without acknowledg- ing the help of others. The wise and confident acknowledge this help with gratitude.” Author Unknown |
Did you enjoy your day? My day was intense, but good. On top of that, I met with two friends today.
My Gratitudes for Friday:
1. I'm resolving an issue with a friend I've known for a long time, more than 35 years. I'm grateful I was firm, but kind, courteous and honest.2. I'm thankful I've learned to say what I mean,
mean what I say, but not say it meanly.
3. I've been adding new friends to my life. It's a fun experience, but a tentative experience.
Ruminations About New Friends
New friendships are like baby plants. Some of them will die. and they should. Relationships require attention, time and effort, if they are to thrive. In the beginning stage, I'm vigilant to see if our values are congruent. I'm careful about this because I know that, characterologically, we are the average of the five people we hang out with. So, I dole out the title of "pal" to an acquaintance with great care, after much attention given to the little shrub.
I use discretion when choosing friends. If I don't exercise caution, I easily give away big chunks of me. This happens because I'm an attentive listener by profession.
I attend to others well. New friends love it. The problem is that usually they don't realize I haven't said much. I prefer mutual relationships. What a basic, but easily overlooked concept. Connecting with others can't happen if they aren't bonding, making the effort to find out what is alive, percolating within each other.
Part of my growth as an adult is stopping others when they've talked at length. I say, "I need to stop you. For the past twenty minutes you've been speaking, and I haven't said a word. For the next twenty minutes we will talk about me. I have a need for equality and balance in our friendship." You should see the look on their faces, but good for me.
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How about you? What do you look for when starting a healthy friendship? Do you agree with me? If not, I'd love hearing your views.
Thanks for dropping by. May this weekend be a terrific one for you, full of love and gratitude.
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2 comments:
I have now twice neglected to post my gratitude’s.
I am grateful that I was given the opportunity to help my sister in a time of need.
I am very grateful for all the love my children show me. My kids rock!
I am grateful for all the support I receive in my life.
Taken new people into your life can be a wonderful thing. The people you surround yourself with are always a direct reflection of who we are. They act as a mirror for us to see all of our beliefs, thoughts, and how we view the world.
Great subject Mr. Innkeeper. I am grateful I clicked the button to follow your blog! ;)
Good morning Cary,
As you know you got mail from me in response to these comments.
It invigorates me when a guest to this inn signs the registry by posting three gratitudes. It makes the innkeeper delighted---it warms my heart when we celebrate life, community and connection here.
What would we do without our children? You must feel terrific, knowing you are appreciated, loved and enjoy a special connection with your children.
I wish you a terrific Monday and success with your writing.
The Innkeeper
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