Taking Care of My Needs, Reassured I Am Not Crazy ..... 8/3/14

   Yes, it is that moment. Time for the weekly roundup, sharing the high and low points for the last seven days.  Was your week inspiring?  Or did it produce an upside down smile?  Mine was phenomenal.  Excellent, even.  Here is how it looked:

Banishing Angels, Receiving Care, Singing, Enjoying Authenticity, Being True to My Values

       The innkeeper is tired, needing a break.   Rest is demanding my attention.   Tonight, I shall bed at an earlier hour---for me.   An important appointment awaits tomorrow.   At my best, I want to be.  I eagerly anticipate the visit, the most important of the entire week.  Tomorrow includes three additional clients beyond my normal schedule.  Busy, I will be.

   What am I thankful for? How about this?
1.  I had a two friends hear me out today, at length. One spent time with me in the afternoon, the other, tonight, when I got home from work. The care and companionship they offered helped me relax, feeling loved.
2.  I cleared out a storage unit I was renting.  Saving money is always good. The physical exertion was terrific too.  I needed it.  My work has its stress.  Hefting boxes was a practical way to discharge it.
3.  Last night I played the guitar with someone new.  I enjoyed sharing songs with him that he didn't know, as he played along.  It was nice, singing, too. I even shared a couple of songs of mine.
4.  I gathered with friends who are authentic, genuine, last night.  I love what each person said. No one dominated the evening.  I appreciate the rarity that this group provides. No one spoke from their head.  Everyone spoke from their heart, being present with those there. They didn't try to:
a.  Manage other people's impression of them.
b.  No one tried asserting control, by over-talking, or managing the outcome of the conversation.

      Instead, they said what was alive within them.  It gives me hope for the human race, being with people who can be vulnerable, yet stay in the solution.
5.  I will talk with a loved one soon.  I am eager to discover the outcome of our time. Our times meet my need for compassion, and self-expression.
6.  I am happy seeing someone getting stronger, less passive.  She has a cheating husband who has no conscience, and wants to continue his infidelity.  She stood for her values. Her abusive husband got angry, instead of apologizing for violating his marriage vows. What nerve. Creeps like that pollute our society.  I don't apologize for making this statement.  I don't mind taking a stand for the family and marriage.
7.  I used tissue paper, the kind for gifts to banish more than twenty angels from my house.  They were consigned to five cardboard boxes.  I am not done with this project.  Progress, not perfection.  But enough is enough.  I inherited multiple porcelain angels when moving into my house in June.

     It's great reducing clutter, it provides greater clarity, more peace of mind.

***

      Someone recently suggested a change to me.  I told him if he wanted to do that, go ahead.  He let me know he had it in mind for me, too.  I told him I wasn't interested.  He asked why.  I told him I didn't need to justify myself .

      His head rocked back when I said that quietly, but firmly. It didn't make sense to him, as he tried persuading me about his idea.  That's okay, the choices I make do not have to make sense to him or others.  They only need to seem right to me.  They do.  This is being internally referented.

      My friend was quiet the rest of the night.  The gratitude?

Gratitude Seven: I love making my own choices, having autonomy.  I enjoy being true to my values, while being calm and courteous towards those who see things differently.  I allow them the freedom to be themselves.  I only ask that they grant me the same right.

How About You? 
What are your gratitudes? Please share with us. Thanks.  

Gratitude, Entitlement, and Uncertainty ............ 7/30/14

      Tonight, I am introducing a new contributor to the inn.  Please welcome David F.  He is a life-long Bay Area resident, hailing from Palo Alto.  Thank you, David, for sharing your journey towards having greater gratitude!

***********

      Currently, my life is in a more significant state of turmoil and uncertainty than it has been in a long time.  I’m homeless (well, crashing in a friend’s backroom), have minimal income and savings.  The direction forward is not

The Innkeeper's Conversation With God, The Why of Life's Challenges 7/29/14

Even when the storm involves fighting circumstances
requiring patience, and I don't care to exercise it. 

       I was happy all day.  Speaking with someone special will do that.  Yes, I have a zest for life.  I am the wealthiest man on earth:  I enjoy the work I do, have great loved ones and am making the most of my abilities.

        Besides that, I am one grateful, happy guy.  Abundance is not in how much we have, but in how much we enjoy.  However, as mentioned here,  I am wrestling with a quality that can be tough on a motivated fellow who is action oriented.  Need I say what it is??  Yes, it is that word...

A Lesson In Perseverance 7/26/14

     Saturdays can be a day of weariness.  I feel the weight of a busy, demanding week.  Serving others, dealing with depression, suicidal ideation, abusive relationships, OCD and anxiety takes its toll upon the innkeeper.

     Sleep seduced me.  I spent more time with her this morning.  Good.  A thousand pounds of

A Fantastic, Rare, and Unfinished Conversation. Wisdom, Greater Than Knowledge ..................7/26/14

A picture I took a couple of months ago, while at the shore of Half Moon Bay
About an hour before the sun said good night and sank into the Pacific Ocean. 

My Gratitudes for Friday:
1.  I am getting my sea-legs under me.  For the past month-and-a-half I have been getting acquainted with living in a new town, having a new schedule and multiple changes that overloaded my ability to cope, physically, spiritually and mentally. The dizzying effect of these changes, happening all at once,

Grateful for Faith and the Source Behind It........... 7/24/14

 
     Engrossed in writing this post, I overlooked the deadline.  So, here I am, submitting a post at the earliest  time possible.  I am relaxed, anticipating all the good that will happen today, Thursday.  I am weary, though at ease.  The week has been

Grateful for Nonviolent Communication, Emotional Object Constancy and Emotional Maturity Gotten by Recovery........ 7/22/14

No, I am not a mortician. No. this is not a picture of
me. But, this is how it was tonight, but I was sitting.
 I know.  Yecch.
The picture below is another version of the same
 thing.  No, I am not a masochist, either. Far from it.

        A better day.  But, contending routinely happens on Tuesday night. Tonight was no exception.  If only it weren't so.  I am not Superman, or should I say, Sir Lancelot.  No one enjoys conflict, even me, the Attitude of Gratitude guy.  My body gets a clammy feeling, a cold sweat overcomes me, dread hangs like a

Surmounting Life's Challenges...... 7/21/14

Garin Park.  The San Francisco Bay in the Background. The
 thin strip of land beyond it is the San Francisco Peninsula 

      The innkeeper is happy introducing Poppy Richie, a guest blogger.  She is a long-term teacher in the East Bay.

        The Upper Ridge Trail in Northern California's Garin Park, is accessible after hiking a rigorous ascent with little shade.  The hills are green in the late spring, making this is a favorite hike taken with my Schnauzer-terrier dog Roxie.  The California poppy flowers paint the hills bright

The Week In Review............ 7/19/14

       I am at a loss.  Confused.  Frustrated.  Also elated, encouraged, inspired.  Making sense of life can be futile.  It is often best not