Friday, April 10

State of the Innkeeper---He's Been Wiped Out 4/10/15

Gratitudes for Today:
1.  Rest,plenty of it. My mind has been strongly stressed, all week. An old wound rose up and bit me, depleting me, emotionally and physically.  I didn't realize how vulner-able I was to a
dark season that consumed three years of my past.

      I have been physically sick, every day this week, including today. Each day, wiped out.  I am convinced it is due to time I spent in court Monday, helping someone in need. I had no idea scarring wounds from thirteen years ago would grab me as they did.

     Additionally, I  have been wrestling with dark, negative, spiritual forces, while assisting someone whose husband is applying satanic powers as he tries to get his way.  It's taken everything out of me.
2.  I was gentle towards myself.  I did not beat myself up, emotionally, when I was less than my best self since Monday.  I allowed myself to be the Pablo I was these past few days: vulnerable, wounded, but confident in God's power and His love for me and that which I receive from many others.
3.  I had terrific correspondence with an amazing person today.  I was happy I could help someone who is also sick and is being tried severely.  My connection with this person lifted my spirits.
4.  I am getting, I think, greater clarity about my future. I am embracing differences and seeking God's direction.  I am not being impulsive. I am resting, not resisting the tension I am enduring.  I think I am grieving loss and seeking God's direction. His is always the best.
"The mind of man plans his ways, but the Lord directs his steps."                                        Proverbs 16:9
5.  The many wonderful comments received over the past two weeks. Thank you, for encouraging me with your insights and responses to what I share here.  It motivate me and I am happy, when receiving them.
6.  For calmness. The result of stopping, spending time with God.  When I do, I don armor. It helps me get through the glancing blows I experience when going through my day.
7.  For my future.  It is uncertain. But one thing is clear.  Notwithstanding the difficulties I encounter,  I would not want to have any other life.  I love my life, it is rich, fulfilling and full of joy, even when times are tough. And for that, I have an Attitude of Gratitude.

           May you have a great and grateful weekend.  I know I will!                                      The Innkeeper
at 11:59:00 PM Written by the innkeeper

1 comment:

Dina Toyoda said...

Poor Innkeeper! Our God is great, because we can always rely on His help and wisdom!

April 11, 2015 at 4:03 PM

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