Sunday, October 12

Lifted Up By Friends and Family 10/12/14

          As a kid growing up, I could not express my feelings.  Not allowed.  This week I did.  But only after my emotions were tempered by common sense received from friends and family.

         My supportive network rescued me from my younger fiery ways.  Being petulant about my circumstances was my fondest desire, early last week.  It would have been satisfying to act out----------for maybe ten minutes.   As much as I would want to dance before Hells Angels in a tutu, is how much I wanted to be
complacent about what bothered and irked me.  It is emotionally frustrating, being reasonable all the time.

          First, was Stuart.  For more than twenty years we've known each other.  He got an earful.  He is good at that.  Patient, he is.  He is also irritating and encouraging at the same time.  Forty to fifty seconds go by before he replies, when plied with a question.  Yet, Stuart's comments are insightful and helpful.  His humor gets in the way of my intensity.  Just what I need when my feelings are at a fevered pitch.  Really.  He provided humor and perspective.
   
         Next was a female friend.  Her perspective and kind support was inval-uable.  Her concern for me was a calm-ing, reassuring presence and she provided a feminine point of view.

          Lastly, my son, Pablo Jr.  I dread talking with him about anything that vexes me.  Seldom does he agree.  He's blunt and practical, counter-balancing the nonviolent communication I practice and my theoretical nature.  Good.  If we were both alike, one of us would be unnecessary.

          He's the devil's advocate, when discussing a point with him.  It is emotional masochism, seeking his support.  He tells me what I hate hearing.  Yet, it is great for my pride.  He is usually right.  His com-ments invariably leave a blister on the ball of the foot of my conscience when running the first mile of a emotional marathon.  Good, again.  It slows me down from my impetuous ways.

          Each of these special people embodied the quote that started this post.  I am a lucky man. With the support of others, I will fall as many times as I would, if I handled life alone.  The difference is now, when I do, I have others lifting me up.  And for that,  I had a Attitude of Gratitude

****
My Gratitudes: 
1.  Thankful for the help of others.  They provide perspective I lack, especially when enmeshed with an issue. 
2.  I am grateful for the balance I have in my life because I have a supportive community and loving family. 
3.  I am thankful that when I fall, concussions are prevented because others that catch me when I slip. 
4.  I was happy spending time with my family, as we watched the San Francisco Giants baseball team play tonight. The game was exciting, to the last second. 
5. Last night I relaxed with a friend, watching a more than superb movie, Gone Girl. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's a great effort for me to reach out to people and I know it is key to recovery(from straying off my soul's fulfillment) and living an inspired life. Days and weeks are full and this becomes low on the list of priorities. Connecting with new people, new ways that support the visions and dreams just seems like a lot of work. Well, I had a little awakening and I'll explain it like this; Have you ever seen or heard of a rich man or woman who wasn't happy? It's just much to common! And a poor man/woman or someone in need of more money(most of us) would say " If I had that kind of money I would buy this, do this, etc.. and would be happy and so much at ease". Only if the rich and poor minds merged together. And that's what happened to me recently. I work with numerous different types of health care professionals.(rich person). I wished that I had time to go to groups meetings and places to I meet some supportive people(poor person). Then I realized what a wonderful group of people I work with(the merge). These people help and deal with people's hard times. Most of them are big hearted, caring, smart and helpful by nature. The light bulb of gratefulness went off in my head after more than a decade working with them. Though not all are safe to talk about certain things, a handful are. I call them my "gateway people". I'm now grateful about this realization and that I also know how to guard my heart with a little more diligence,thanks to a friend. It didn't stop at the workplace. I feel that right people run into me in my daily life with conversations I need at the right times. Kind of feels eerie sometimes like God working his magic through them. Maybe I'm just more aware of it. I except it now and giggle after the interactions happen. -CoolBreeze

Pablo said...

CoolBreeze,

I agree. We need to have a support network that undergirds us. You are right, also, developing healthy friendships is hard work, but more than worth it.

Those moments you talk about, when God works His magic through others I call kisses from God. I love how conscious and aware you are. I wish more people were like you.

Thank you, for sharing what you have been learning lately. You lifted up my day with your comments.

I am wishing the best for you and applaud your efforts to connect with healthy people who operate from a recovery perspective.

May your tribe increase. You have my prayers,

The Innkeeper

Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.

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