Thursday, June 25

Three Tips Towards Having Peace of Mind................. 6/25/15

     Not long ago, someone screeched at me through a letter.

      Threatening all kinds of evil.  Yes, at me, the Attitude of Gratitude guy.  She was my dragon lady.  Writing the word "was," in the previous sentence was a comfort.  It relaxes my heart, not seeing her.

       What did I do, when reading a letter of hers, dripping with venom?  I
wrote back, right away, thanking her for the letter.  Of course I would have genuine gratitude. You knew that.

1. That's step number one. Seeing the benefit in whatever predicament we are in.  In this case:

a.  She provided an occasion for me to express my boundaries.
b.  This person allowed me to say what was acceptable and unacceptable, in our dealings with each other.  She allowed me to self-express.
c.  Her comments helped me understand her worldview and values.  I told her I was not in agreement with them. I didn't say she was wrong.  I disagreed, that's all.  What she wrote validated my decision to no longer see her.  More about this in point three, below.
d. I appreciated my times with her were ending.

 2.   Not accepting unacceptable be-havior.  If I want drama, I see a play or movie. That way, I leave it there, when heading home.  Boring is not boring.  It is being normal. If my normalcy as a child was chaos and drama, I realize I need to get used to calmness. It is how life was meant to be.  It's not good for any heart to be constantly racing, because of tension.

       It is not my job, pleasing others. I am not responsible for the feelings of others.  That's their property.  My feelings are mine.  No one can make any of us angry, sad, happy or any other feeling, without us giving them permission to do so.

3.  I don't take the behavior or comments of others personally.  They reveal the character of the other person. I am internally refer-ented.  I base my decisions and actions on my values, truth and beliefs. Those who care for me accept who I am, even if we disagree.  My value is not based on the opinion others have of me. I have worth simply being me.

     I enjoy the sim-plicity, serenity and joy I have when I live by healthy principles, not letting others de-fine me or determine my moods.

How About You?  Do you let others intimidate you?

1 comment:

DINA TOYODA said...

I don't know. I push back, when I'm intimidated, but being wise at those moments doesn't come naturally yet.

Quotes from the Posts

"I'm mindful that our thoughts affect the words we use, our words influence our actions, our actions shape our character and our character determines our destiny."

From "My Character Determines My Destiny." To read it, please click here.

"Progress not perfection, is better than no progress at all, especially when we're trying to rid ourselves from unwelcome dragons that dwell within the closets of our soul."

From, "Still Learning" which, within four days, became the most popular post
written. To read it, please click here.

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its trouble, but it does empty today of its strength"
From the post: "Life Is Not a Correspondence Program." Click here to read it.

"Even though we cannot control our circumstances, we can control how we choose to respond to them."

From, "Handling Stress and Dealing With an Emotional Bully."Click here to read this post.

"Nope, being busy isn't exciting. Boring is good. Because boring is not boring; boring is being healthy, living a balanced life that has serenity"

From: "Do You Know What It Means If You Are Too Busy?" For more, please click here.

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